December 2007
40 posts
um, yeah...
so “SunBuns” was right, I’m a little confused about my posts yesterday…I thought I was brilliant when I wrote them. I also thought I was brill in my actual lunch discussion with coworkers- included Ron Jeremy being a coach in the NBA (really it’s Stan Van Gundy, but you’re just asking for the comparison when you have a 70s mustache), also included my stories...
buzz is fading.
now i’m entering a sleepy phase, but at my fun lunch I must have opened the door to making new friends b/c the one guy just sent me a video about Drive By Farting? the 8-yo boy that lives insde me wants to watch it but the 32-yo “lady” won’t let him while someone else is in my office.
I need to stop writing but it’s this or running up and down the stairs and they’re locked today. the woman I share my offce with was on speaker…but I didn’t know…and was talking to another coworker’s 2 yo that’s here today…talking in a Chipmunk voice (bc i saw the damn thing on Monday, but I still like Jason Lee)…so the payroll guy heard me...
I really can’t wait for Vegas. SunBuns said my secret is out. hahah, SunBuns. I am writing like I think. I am thinking and writing like a robot. coo coo ca choo!!
o.m.g.
I have a page on Facebook. Do I use it? no. I have received no less than Alana T this week…I’ve been SuperPoked, whatever the heck that means…by her to make a snowman, sing carols, and while I was at lunch she gave me milk an cookies. wtf mate? Also Casey Bl;lsdfjldjf asked to be my friend. How did he find me? Does he think he knows me? The most he knows of me is that I once...
i'm a little buzzed.
went to lunch with fun people at work…made the mistake of having 2 big beers with only a salad…nothing to absorb…i expect to want to nap in 20 mins. okay, 15 mins. karate explosion! i think my pupiles are too large and someone caught me looking at them in the bathroom.
rob huebel - new tumblr to have tiny hearts over →
best three page tumblr i’ve ever seen. — chloesanchez my input…i’ve hearted RH for a while now, ever since I saw him in a NetZero commercial…since I won’t explain it well, I’ll just note- Karate Explosion!
if only there were sound...
…you would hear me singing “writing something dumb on tumblr…verbal diarrhea…” it’s catchy and I expect it to be #2 on Adult Contemp once Timbaland produces it. So…due to curiousity after a work happy hour last night…I found out that 2 coworkers who were caught a few months ago making out in the stairwell (by a maintenance guy, who obviously owes no...
I don't have anything of my own to write today,...
I woke up to my phone beeping around 9am…which was great b/c I wanted to go to church (but uh, once again I ended up falling asleep again and waking up in the afternoon). Anyway, Chloe texted me 3 times! 1- I just woke up from a dream where you wrote a funny semi autobiographical [kudos for typing that out, I would have put “story”] novel, and in the movie it had a scene where a...
Someone's got a case of the Mondays...
I just might have to tell someone they’re a no-talent assclown. And I didn’t wear my flair today either.
Dear MLB and MLB players…
Today you suck, you know that? Oh MLB, you think it’s just the players that are at fault? You may have dug yourself out of further hate from me by publishing the info on mlb.com, but I have a hard time believing that you didn’t see the steroid train coming your way. Those not reporting abusers might as well be abusers themselves. I already hated Roger, but come on Lo Duca…I...
PD adventure 12.13
well…PD (reference 1, 2) and the rest of the admin group went to lunch. Seems like “admin” includes accounting until there are perks! Anyway…NC (ref 1, 2) sent him to the DMV to correct the registration for our new car. About 5 minutes later someone came running “who sent [PD] to the DMV? Who sent him out??” It turns out that PD had about 7 shots of single...
Reblogging...
…if I reblog D the same day that S reblogs me, is it proper etiquette for D to reblog S? Or will that create a hole in the space-time continuum? dude…
I wish that I could have seen her face during... →
— dewster Ha…Dewster cracked me up with this…just a few months ago, a certain JB received a mysterious voicemail of screeching “you’re in the jungle baby, you’re gonna DIE!” He didn’t know who left it…I still can’t believe to this day that he didn’t know it was me immediately.
word of the day: umami already hungry for lunch…
“I think he was born in a humidore of ganja.”
– coworker JP about PD after we tried to figure out why and how PD’s so happy.
it travels!
ha, related to SS’ post here, someone just walked down the hallway doing the bow-chicka-bow-wow porn song. no one laughed except me, so I think this might be an acceptable noise now. “hey, the Knicks won! bow-chicka-bow-wow…” “did you watch McLaughlin Group? bow-chicka-bow-wow…”
Ridiculous things that make me cry.
- any episode of Cold Case, after which I shout “stupid tv!!” - ASPCA commercial, I mean come on. - Fresh Prince of Bel Air- the episode where his dad (Pippin’s Ben Vereen!) comes back and he gets really excited, but then dad cuts out just like Uncle Phil told him he would and Will crys and yells at the end “why doesn’t he want me?” See, it’s a big deal, it has its own paragraph. Just don’t let...
Oooh, I forgot to mention…when Loaded sang Baba O’Riley, Sunset-Grill-Man double-pointed at the band, then around to people behind him “We’re all wasted! Wasted!” PS He also had a moustache. PPS I don’t like the remixed version of Baba O’R for this season’s theme to CSI NY. I think they re-did the CSI Miami too. Boo.
Men ignore you.
So…I watched Loaded (K’s husband M’s band) play this past Friday in Annandale…I need to remember that when I am amused by a drunkie, he’s probably thinking about something else (K called me fresh meat!). I don’t get hit on very often, so it’s confusing when it happens. :) Now I might have a bf whether I meant to or not. Things I learned/was told/was asked Friday night by a slurring drunk guy:...
a love connection in my inbox!
Hello With reference to Dating Website, where I saw your information and decided to send you this mail to request if we could establish a love relationship. I would like us to exchange mails first through this medium, chat or otherwise. I reside in Europe Thanks and God bless tonio tel
Wikipedia must be aching for pictures, because their picture of Uranus (pause for the 3rd grade humor) is really a ping pong ball (and it’s on their front page today!). I think tonight I’ll take a closeup of a racquetball and tell them it’s Neptune.
So Chloe Sanchez is famous...
…and WAY smarter and analytical than I am or can ever hope to be. She has a tumbr-crush on CultrVultr…and it’s mutual: http://cultrvultr.com/post/20921626 http://cultrvultr.com/post/20947607 http://cultrvultr.com/page/5 I don’t know if MG is reading my blog, but I’d love to read his opinions too?? If you decide to blog (whether tumblr or not), I promise to make a...
Nepalese Coworker (NC)
NC: Did you find the answer to your problem?
me: no, it has something to do with employees as they're set up.
NC: You have more brain than me.
me: haha, no.
NC: Your head is bigger, so you have a bigger brain.
me: :( ?
I can’t stop posting today- I bet this stream of consciousness sh*t is what SS was hoping for when she “made me” start this thing… Somehow babies just came up…I said that I don’t seem to have the biological clock that makes you want to have babies (or at least have them myself). My Nepalese coworker doesn’t want to miss out on anything…”what...
Reason why I’m old today: Our 22-yo intern said “hey, your printout got stuck in my report” to which I replied “hey, you got your chocolate in my peanut butter!” Blank stare. Reese’s PB cups in the early 80s? Anyone? Side note…Reese’s is to be pronounced Ree’-sis, not Ree-sees which is what I’ve found in VA/the South. My PA friends...
Dear Pocket O'JBrown,
Dear Pocket, When you called me at 7:30 this morning, I didn’t realize it was you. I thought it was JB himself, so I promptly ignored the call. Two seconds later when my brain actually started functioning, I realized that I had shut my alarms off (there are >3), and quickly jumped out of bed to be late for work yet again. Anyway Pocket, I’m writing to thank you for your call- if...
Excerpts/one-sided conversation, explaining...
- Hmm, I don’t know why a famous movie star would go on the trip by herself. Or that younger girl. Mary Ann. Mary Ann. Kansas or something. I don’t know why the rich couple wouldn’t take their own boat. Luvey. I don’t know what he’s a professor of, but he tried to make things from coconuts and bamboo. Gilligan IS dumb and sometimes did deserve to be hit by the Skipper. - It...
grumble grumble today. stupid weather. stupid people in stupid weather. well, I suppose the 2-hour drive to work this morning (uh, 10 miles!) let me alternate between DC101-EITM and listening to my French audio CD. -What is the soup du jour? -It’s the soup of the day. -Mmm, sounds good, I’ll have that.
It often occurs to me that none of my friends know what I do, which I’ve come to accept. I thought about it again right now, thinking “I bet no one I know is trying to find a chart for November’s 1-month LIBOR rate.” Every child has a dream.
gbf@w: lunch?
me: I don't think I can, I don't think I have money. Ooh wait, I have $1.
me: Ooh, $2, $3. we can go to McD's. ooh, $4.
gbf@w: We're up to Taco Bell now!
me: ooh, lipgloss, could I sell that on the street?
gbf@w: no, but you could use the lipgloss and sell yourself on the street.
Superman Insurance Man is here again! If only I had eyeliner so I could write I Love You on my eyelids like in Indiana Jones.
Phrases and words I want to say without laughing.
It’s all very Cats in the Cradle. Facetious (I never know when to use it correctly until it’s too late and no longer applicable). (during a business meeting) Let’s take this offline. (Really, I HATE when people say this). So I says to Mabel, I says… That’s not going to be good for business. That’s not going to be good for anybody. Sally, that old battleaxe. I’m just busting your chops....
